As these difficult times continue, many of us are experiencing new strains on our relationships as well as increased barriers In communication with our loved ones. In some way or another our relationships have faced hurdles due to living in a global pandemic in which our work lives, social lives, and home lives have dramatically shifted. These hurdles are due to a multitude of factors including our individual as well as our partners struggles with mental health, feeling distant or misunderstood by our partner, or stress induced by conflicts at work or in other areas of our lives. Although the issues that arise in relationships may be due to external forces, sometimes it is our own thoughts and negativity that distances us from our partners, especially if things feel unspoken or unresolved.
Support from loved ones, though, is critical for getting through this difficult moment, as such, we need to strengthen our relationships with loved ones. One way we can do this is by recognizing how we might be standing in our own way in terms of connecting, communicating, and trusting our partner, often beginning with The following are nine toxic thoughts we all have fallen prey to when things become strained with partner:
The All or Nothing Trap
When you feel like your partner is always right or always wrong
When you feel that something negative will happen as a result of your partner’s actions
The “Should” Bomb
When you feel that your partner should know what your needs are and meet them
When you use negative labels to describe your partner and struggle to focus on their positive qualities
The Blame Game
When you feel that issues in your relationship or larger issues are caused by your partner
Emotional Short Circuits
When you feel like you can’t handle your partners emotions
When you reach negative conclusions about your partner that are not based in reality
Head Game Gamble
When you feel that outsmart your partner by assuming their actions are due ulterior motives
When you have idealized expectations of your partner that are rooted in the past
It is a natural part of relationships to experience conflict and hardship; however, use this list on toxic thoughts as a way to check-in and see if your relationship may need a tune up.
For more information on the article that inspire this post, click here.